


Dreams and Isolation

by SilverScribblerX



Category: Shall We Date?: Obey Me!
Genre: During Canon, F/M, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Lilith's death is referenced, M/M, No actual mention of what the thing he did is, Other, just talking
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-10
Updated: 2020-09-10
Packaged: 2021-03-06 21:00:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,517
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26395303
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilverScribblerX/pseuds/SilverScribblerX
Summary: Belphegor is alone when MC finds him. They know what they need to do to help him, his brothers, but also to help themselves. So, MC takes a moment to listen to Belphegor and what he shares with them is not what they were expecting.~~~Prompt: "So maybe you fell in love with humanity a long time ago, why is that such a horrible thing?"My Brain: Belphegor was done dirty by the devs not being able to give him the time we got with the other brothers so we never did get to really know or understand him. Imma do a thing.Me: *writes a fic*Also Me: Huh, I just don't know how to prompt fill now do I?
Relationships: Belphegor & Lilith (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!), Belphegor (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!) & Reader
Comments: 21
Kudos: 21





	Dreams and Isolation

**Author's Note:**

  * For [v_lociraptor](https://archiveofourown.org/users/v_lociraptor/gifts).



Belphegor sat in the planetarium, staring up at the slowly moving planets and contemplating life. He had no idea how to repent for what he’d done. No thoughts to take his mind off of the pain and betrayal coming from his twin. He understood, of course he did, they're always aware of each other’s emotions. This time was different because he knew he was the cause, knew that he alone is to blame for his brother’s anguish. He also knew that his brothers were crowded around the hu- (_). Crowded around (_), the distant descendant of their late sister. The brave, kind-hearted individual who knew to be suspicious of him, but still believed in him enough to free him. The same being he killed as if they were to blame for a death that didn’t come from the war, but after a long and human lifetime had been lived. He sighed, a long, anguished sound that spoke of his guilt, regret, and desire to make amends. There was no making amends, not for this.

“You seem cold,” a cautious, yet kind, voice spoke through the fog of his mind and drew his attention from planets to the doorway. “I brought hot chocolate.” A raised tray with two steaming mugs and sweets rested upon one of their palms, but the inviting cow print blanket they had draped over their other arm held his attention.

“You grabbed my blanket?” He didn't mean to sound angry, but he was put off by the idea that one of his brothers gave the blanket his sister had made him to the hu-(_) so easily. Their visible wince made him backtrack, “Sorry, I just… Lilith made me the blanket. You couldn’t have known, I suppose. Try not to spill anything on it, it attracts stains like Mammon attracts debt.” A startled, but amused, laugh spilled passed their lips. He made them laugh? He was surprised he had done so, but relaxed with the knowledge they could at least laugh in his presence.

“I promise I’ll be careful,” they swore and upheld. Cautiously, they walked forward to set the tray on the end table next to him before draping the blanket over his shoulders and wrapping it in the front. “There, now if any chocolate spills on it, you can only blame yourself.” They gave a cheeky smile, but their eyes were nervous, unsure of boundaries not yet set in their relationship.

“Thank you…” what else was there to say?

Silence broke between them before (_) sat down and gave him a mug. “We need to talk. If nothing else, we owe your brothers at least that much. For ourselves, as well, I guess.” He knew it was coming, but found himself hiding behind his hair and looking into his mug in shame. 

“...I can’t ask for you to forgive me. I know that, but what is talking going to do for this?” Cynical and hurting, his tone was annoyed and frustrated while they merely frowned at him in response.

“Well, for one, I want to know why you killed me. None of this ‘I blame humanity for my sister’s death’ crap either. Why, Belphegor? Why was that your solution to your pain? Did it even work for you? Were you in a better place having killed me to avenge her?” With each question it was obvious to Belphegor why Satan seemed so enamored. (_) truly did embody their emotions with their entirety, even Wrath.

“...No. It didn’t,” no use in lying, not anymore. His lies have outlived their usefulness and now he spoke with a morose tone and a sob in his throat. He was angry with himself, anguished with his twin, and so guilt ridden he hardly recognized himself.

A pause, held for a moment almost too long, before a hand gently covered his. His hands were shaking, theirs steadied him and kept his drink from sloshing. “Then talk.”

A dam, breaking. Words, stumbling. Every sorrow, guilt, lie, pain, and regret laid itself bare before them both. It took three hours and both mugs sat empty on the now bare tray. When he was done, voice hoarse from emotion and talking for so long, he realized (_) had tricked him into eating and drinking between sentences. His stomach no longer growled and the chill had left his bones. Things he had ignored and not realized he’d suffered through before they approached him, now calmed and warmed with their presence. A broken laugh left him so similar and yet different from the laughter he pealed over their dead and broken form. They watched him, not out of caution, but with understanding. 

He had been alone with his thoughts and dreams, unable to make a sound lest he steal sleep away from his already tormented twin. Isolated by centuries turning into millennia of seeing his brothers’ nightmares and turning them into dreams. Exhausted from ensuring that at least their sleep went peacefully; so thoughts of their war and falling did not ruin them the way his, and their, nightmares haunted him even while awake. He was tormented and defiant in the face of it all, but with no one to turn to. After all, the person he did talk to was gone. He had failed her when she needed him most and blamed the creatures she loved for everything he couldn't say to her. For everything he couldn't do for her. He turned to murder not just to ruin Diavolo and Lucifer, but because he wanted to take someone from humanity as he claimed humanity had taken from him. It didn't work because the death of someone so young, even if they were an adult, was nothing when humanity killed themselves with even more ease than he had in taking their life. Then he realized his sister wasn't dead from the war, but from a life among humanity where she had children who would eventually descend to (_)'s generation. The realization that he had killed someone who could have been the last gift from his sister to the worlds was crushing in a way not even Atlas from Greek myths could know. “She, like (_),” he thinks as he begins to realize their similarities in values and traits most likely taught to each generation, “was always so easy to talk to. She was patient, kind, and compassionate. The Angel of Love who truly embodied all that Love was and could give. I wonder if (_) would be the same…” His laughter had died and now he stared at them, eyes wondering and each passing moment rears a new revelation that they watch unfold as they wait for an explanation. 

“I realize you’re probably tired of the comparisons, but you truly are like Lilith in some ways. Maybe it’s genetic, but she’s the only one I’ve even been able to talk to. Not even Beel could get me to talk so openly.” A smile, a gift for his honesty and a quiet affirmation that, while they may not be able to forgive him so soon, they would at least accept his words and be understanding. 

“Your brothers won’t hear a word from me, Belphegor. Not unless you’re ready. Though, that makes smoothing things over with them all and you a lot harder.” A frown as they concentrate and consider their options, already planning for a future with him in it. A warmth spreads to his cheeks when that thought crosses his mind.

“I think it may be easier than you realize. My brothers pick up on your emotions, but they can also read a room and people themselves. Even Mammon would pick up on us trying to move passed..what I did. If that’s truly what you want at least.” He cursed himself for the assumption that they were working towards forgiving him and not just trying to stitch his family back together. It was too soon, too raw, and why would th-

“I do want that. Holding onto that pain and anger isn’t good. One day I’d snap and hurt someone that’s innocent simply because of a way I was wronged in the past.” He flinched, honestly should have seen that coming, but they’d made their point. “Think your brothers can accept that?” 

“Yes… Thank you. For letting me talk, for feeding me because I do realize you got me to eat and drink everything while taking nothing for yourself, (_). You should see if Beel is getting into the kitchen and grab something for yourself.”

“You don’t want to come with me?” They seemed impressed that he noticed, grateful that he wanted them to feed and care for themselves, but also concerned that he was avoiding Beel.

“Nah, I’m tired. You’ve kept me from my nap and made me talk instead of sleeping.” His tone was annoyed, but playful. 

Laughter, pure and light with their amusement, was the sweetest sound he has ever fallen asleep to. He hoped he could continue to make them laugh like that, but for now, rest. After all, he had dreams to spin in the night.

**Author's Note:**

> the-v-lociraptor linked me to a prompts post on Tumblr and I saw the first one, but cut off, in the link so I filled that with a quick two paragraph thing that was left ambiguous as all Devildom. Then I decided to try and actually fill the real prompt, but still didn't really fill it. Prompt: "So maybe you fell in love with humanity a long time ago, why is that such a horrible thing?" was actually a really good prompt, but I didn't write to answer that question, I just wrote to explore Belphie's character a bit more. I feel it's important to note what the inspiration for this story was though, hence my even mentioning it at all. 
> 
> [Check out my raptor friend](https://the-v-lociraptor.tumblr.com) /  
> [Prompts Post](https://a-u-prompts.tumblr.com/post/628894833455546369/coffin-prompts-so-maybe-you-fell-in-love-with)
> 
> Please give me feedback! I love reading and responding to comments.


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